It’s cold out there!

0 | January 9th, 2012 | Posted in Amber English, Motivation

A few years ago I was running in the cold as much as I could.  It was enjoyable to get away from all my problems and leave them in the cold, dark night.  Last year, during the winter, it was slightly different.  I was attempting to run but was aggravated and irritated with the thought of having to go out.  But I had races I signed up for, so out I went.

All throughout last year I was battling some pretty deep feelings (at times) of depression, hatred, remorse, happiness, and a few others I’m sure.  But the point is, I was up and down and all over a lot.  I separated from my husband and filed for divorce.  Even though it’s what I wanted, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.

I mostly stopped running unless it was a long race that I was doing that I absolutely needed some miles in.  If it was a big race, I would train about a month to two months before hand, only running enough that I knew I wouldn’t die after the race.  If it was a smaller race (5K or 8K) I wouldn’t run at all.  I dreaded running.  I had too much “stuff” going on in my life and running wasn’t the answer to it all before, so why should I force it in now? 

I’ve struggled all year, trying to be happy and get back into exercising, when the truth is, I just really needed a break.  So what if I’m not down to my correct body fat percentage.  So what if I gained a few pounds?  So what if I don’t have a washboard stomach?  Those are all things I want, but when you’re in a personal crisis mode trying to make sure you’ve got your life on track, forcing time for a run just isn’t at the top of the list anymore. 

I wasn’t trying to become the most unhealthy person in the world either, but I surely wasn’t doing anything to be fit and tone and washboard-y.  How does someone get out of such a huge funk?  You take things one by one.  I had to learn how to be a single mom of 2, have a full time job and attend college part time, while keeping up my house, yard, and everything else.  I had no time for running.

I love running so much I felt bad that I wasn’t doing it, which made me feel bad that I couldn’t do everything, which then added an overwhelming feeling to everything.  Because I’m Superwoman you know?

Once I came to terms with the fact that I’m not Superwoman, I was able to start organizing all those parts of my life better(and I’m still working on the organization of everything else!).  Actually figuring things out about why things are how they are, and not just pretending not to be angry about it all.  I started thinking about exercising more around October.  I had big plans to start Insanity (by Beachbody).  I wasn’t ready.  I only made it halfway through.

I haven’t run outside since a half marathon I did in October 2011.  I FINALLY ran outside this past Saturday with a couple friends after one of them posted on Facebook about wanting to run.  It was spontaneous and I almost backed out of it.  But I said ‘what the hell’ and went.  Yesterday and today I have been so sore.  But I wouldn’t trade it for anything. 

It made me feel so good to run.  It was outside, and it was so cold in the wind, but it was nice.  I’m hoping to keep up the exercise and running this time.  A few years ago I got Cindy out and running in the cold and we had rules if it was under a certain degree or wind chill we wouldn’t run, but no excuses otherwise.  I can do this.  And so can she.  We are going to take charge of this winter weather and enjoy ourselves with the out-of-breath girl talk, red faces, runny noses, and cold asses!

Running for the fun of it

0 | October 27th, 2011 | Posted in Amber English, Motivation

Where has the time gone?  It certainly hasn’t gone to my exercise routine.  I just flat out haven’t been doing much exercise at all.  When it comes to running, I love it…I absolutely love it.  So why am I not running?  Why am I not doing anything really?  Easy answer, mild depression.  I’ve been through a lot in the last year and I’ve neglected exercise completely.

I won’t get into a lot of details of my personal life, that is what my other blog is for.  But my running (and all exercise really) has suffered and it’s completely a result of the stress I have that’s been weighing me down.  Since I know that, I should be able to fix it, right?  Hmm, easier said than done.  I’ve had ups and downs and all arounds and nothing has been consistent.  That may be part of the problem though.

To spike my motivation, I signed up for the races that I normally do every year, all year.  I wasn’t prepared for any single one of them.  5K’s are not too terribly bad to just pick up and run.  8K’s or even a 10K…still not terrible but I would be sore afterward.  Then there was a 10 miler, and a half marathon, I should be smarter than that really.  But I picked up and ran each one of those with very little training.

I thought signing up for them would keep me motivated, and maybe any other year they would have, but this year, my stress level in basically every part of my life was way over the excessive limit.  More than I could really handle.  There was a downward spiral and I was drowning.  And quite frankly, those races added more stress because I knew I wasn’t prepared for them.  I think my hope was that I would dive back into running to help me cope and it never happened.

So what do you do when running has lost its fun and enjoyable parts?  You try other things of course.  I biked a little this year, but not nearly as much as I even did last year.  I think I hiked with Cin Langston once, which affected us both because we didn’t have consistent girl talk time that would relieve either of us during a hike.  I bought the Insanity DVD workout to try something new.  It was hard, and I made it 5 weeks in, then stress about my half marathon creeped in and I didn’t finish it.

So now I have some added weight that has somehow found its way on to me through all of my non-exercise and terrible eating habits.  I know you’re wondering how it got there just as much as I am.  ;-)   It’s becoming the motivation I need to get back into running.  Running was one of the things that made it disappear the fastest. 

So some key reminders after all of this:  running IS fun.  It clears your head if you do it right.  10 minutes on a treadmill might not be enough, but 30 minutes outside surely is (for me anyway).  Don’t stress out so much, and don’t add extra stress if you don’t need to (like piling on the races).  Stress is the silent killer, and if you let it get the best of you, what’s all this for anyway?

Season Two Episode 1

0 | May 23rd, 2011 | Posted in Cin Langston

The trails finally dried up enough for Amber and I to hike them last week and it was fantastic. You just cannot beat the combination of nature, fresh air, a great workout, and the most excellent company of a bestie.  This first foray back into the woods for our second year hiking together, I was reminded of how Amber came to be my bestie. My LP. Amberlicious.

Amber and I discovered hiking together last spring when our friendship was relatively new. Up to that point we’d had a lot of fun drinking margaritas, seeing movies, retarding up each other’s Facebook pages, and being silly in general. But once we went into the woods together – we changed. We bonded over the smells, marveled at the nature and took pictures of phallic shaped mushrooms that sent us to the ground giggling, and earned us the nickname Beavis & Butthead when we posted them on Facebook. We discovered one another’s extreme potty mouths and affinity for F bombs as we were assaulted by bugs of all kinds. Big crunchy ones distracted us with blows about the head and ears, while smaller ones flew in our mouths stung our legs.

Pretty soon our talks about real life became more in depth. Not just bugs and boys, but our families, marriages, and experiences in motherhood. We had quiet talks discussing our views of life, the world, and the planet. We stomped hard into the dirt flailing our arms and loudly venting and complaining. The madder we were the more we bitched, the faster we ran. It was during one of these good productive hikes that we stumbled upon the saying, “Run, Bitch, Run,” which described our beloved activity – run, bitch, run some more. It also applied to one of us encouraging the other to run faster,  ”Run bitch run!” either because of holding the other one up or scared by an elaborate imagination that the noise coming from the woods was some kind of ROUS coming to get us. And I’m not exactly sure when we named the moniker “LP” (life partner) as a funny alternative to “BFF” but in the woods was where we came to feel what it meant. Speaking for myself, it had been a while since I’d had a close in location, like minded friend to share with, cry to, laugh with, and with whom to take out the week’s aggressions.  It was a healthy thing I’d been missing, but didn’t realize it then.

A winter with no hiking has resulted in a cloudy headed, grumpy, and pent up me. I felt it start to melt away a little in Episode 1 of  Season 2 Hiking last week, and hopefully the rain will stop long enough for the trails to dry out for Episode 2 this week with my LP.

 

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Doing it in the Woods

1 | May 14th, 2011 | Posted in Cin Langston, Motivation, Uncategorized

In the woods is my favorite place to do it. In fact, I can’t count how many times while I was doing it Thursday that I actually said, “This is the best place for me to do it. I only want to do it here! I want it more! I want it to be harder and I want to do it every day.” Why do I love it in the woods so much? Because I am so easily bored doing it, that I often quit in the middle and walk away. But I don’t get bored doing it in the woods. And even if I did, I can’t just turn it off and walk away. Once the commitment is made to do it in the woods, it’s very difficult not to see it through to the end.  But it’s just not practical to do it in the woods every day so you have to resolve to doing it wherever you can. Running, hiking, biking, yoga, Zumba, (Wait – What did you think I was talking about?) or whatever your “it” is – “Just Execute It” like Amber says.

My Challenge #1 Priority & Discipline. Amber is more disciplined than I am. I get easily distracted by the day’s list of what I MUST do that I neglect the things I love to do. Even though for health’s sake I MUST work out more to counter act my sedentary lifestyle as a freelance writer, the fact that I love it downgrades it to luxury status in my mind. I’m working on that. Therapy is Wednesdays at 5pm.

My Challenge #2 Focus & Boredom. Nope scratch that. #2 is Imma liar.  I keep saying lately that I just don’t want to work out. It’s boring and I hate it. But when I actually take a moment to think about it – that’s not true at all. I lie to myself to shut me up so I can move on. Hiking is my number one favorite activity but I also am crazy about Yoga Booty Ballet, Kettleworx, Turbo Jam, and Pilates. Once I lick challenge #1 I would have a ball doing any of those.  I can feel my body waking up and getting giddy just thinking about them right now. But guess what! All of those workouts have gone missing. I’ve loaned them out or left them somewhere and no one is fessing up. Shoot, maybe challenge # 2 is replacing my missing fun workouts. Hm. No cus I’m still a liar so that’s a noteworthy something to keep on the list to fix. I’ll call it Challenge #3.

Challenge #3. The good workouts are missing. Find them. And in the meantime, no excuses, Just Do it – Er – Execute it.

 

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Just execute it.

1 | April 26th, 2011 | Posted in Amber English, Uncategorized

It’s a motto.. and something I need to do more of.  So many things to do, so little time or organization to do them..

Rode my bike tonight with my bestie… my LP.. for the first time ever actually.. we’ve never rode together.  Things like this should always have time made for them.. although we didn’t talk much, it felt good to get out and into the cold brisk windy air for a little bit.

I’m going to make it a goal to do more of it.  Life throws so many things at you sometimes, and you just need to take a moment to do the things that you really love.

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